[naturally, Rin has no sense of ever feeling silly in his jammers; rather, they're a part of him that makes him feel strong, and confident, and capable, so in a weird way, it's kind of exciting to be fooling around with Makoto dressed and Rin ready for a dive in the pool. Makoto's confidence is thrilling, but there's something uncertain tightening in his chest. Rin wants to be in control of this, but not full control; he always botches things up on his own, trying to force his own way. it's a little bit out of the blue and a little bit really, really not, this whole scenario, so while he's not questioning if today will be the day, he's nervous about how this will work, if he can actually pull it off -- and puts all that energy into returning Makoto's kiss]

[and some time later, after they've already gotten tangled up hot and heavy on the bed, words escape from him in jagged little breaths as they part. they're said with a fragile kind of strength, meant to hang between the two of them only in this moment]

I've never done -- obviously, I mean, you know... [there aren't any more unknowns, not really, when it came to what their respective experience was like. it's another reason to feel less nervous, even if the anticipation is killing him. he's also maybe a little worried that he's -- not rushing things, definitely not, but that he won't be particularly good at it. videos and embarrassing solo practice did not exactly leave one bursting with confidence] ...s-so, if it's bad, tell me, and I'll... [a nervous trailing off; he'll want to stop, probably, and stick his head under the sink. that's childish, isn't it? he needs to be more brave] ...t-try to do better.